Considerations For Relationships With A Big Age Difference

We often see that older men are in relationships with women who are much younger than them. This is also seen with women who are with younger men. These relationships may be frowned upon in our country but it is quite a common thing in Western countries. An older man dating a younger woman is often seen as a sign of midlife crisis. An older woman dating a younger man is often called a cougar. Homosexual relationships also feature a significant age difference as well. People might joke about such relationships but an age difference might not make any difference in a relationship although it will succeed to create some challenges for the people involved in the relationship. Therefore, you must consider some things before you run into making a decision to be with someone significantly older or younger than you.

1. Know when the age gap is too much

Love is a fickle thing and we don’t always fall in love with the right people. We often make the mistakes that we realize only way too late. This happens in relationships with an age difference too. We have to keep in mind not to do something illegal all the while thinking about only love. Even if what you are doing is legal, think about other things in a relationships. For example, if you want kids, see if your significant other is able to bear children or if he/she is going to be around to help you raise kids.

2. Think about your Reasons

While the people involved in the relationship are answerable to no one, they should know why they are in a relationship with someone with a huge age difference between them. Once in a while, engaging in a relationship with someone older or younger can be ignored, but if it is a long-standing pattern, tread carefully. When a person is looking for someone older than themselves, they might be trying to replace a parental figure or be looking for financial benefits. If someone is looking for someone younger than themselves, they might like the feeling of being admired for an experience.

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3. Prepare Yourself For the Generational differences

When there is an age difference, you will have a difference of views with your partner too. There will be a difference on opinion on technology, on politics, on music, on selection of movies, and many other things. You will have to learn to move past those differences and make an effort to learn more about your partner’s perspectives and experiences. There could be chances that a historical event that you read about actually played an important role in your partner’s life and affected him or her in a significant way.

4. Handling the Criticism

People would not see how perfect your relationship is. They will only see the number of years that span between your partner’s birth and yours. You will get a lot of criticism from your family and friends along with many snide remarks, jokes and questions. You will have to learn a response that will shut down the argument for good because the other alternative is to spend your life explaining to everyone why you are in love with someone who is not your own age.

5. Don’t be stuck on the Age differences

While you might have learned how to handle people when it comes to your relationship, sometimes you might not be ready to completely accept the age difference yourself. The best way to handle that is to forget that there is any difference at all. Love your partner for who he or she is and not for how old he or she is. Focusing too much on the age will only leave you in a jeopardy of self-consciousness and misunderstandings. Don’t let age become a dominant issue in your relationship and let it be a factor only when it is relevant.